Man I get it poppin in the club, everybody show me love

No no, no club this weekend. Saturday I ate breakfast around 10:10 and met one of Ruru's friends at La Mode. I retired to my room, watched 2 wonderful hours of the Sopranos and set out to watch Fast and Furious at Tiger City. I hooked up Gold Pass, ~30 USD for 2 tickets; included is your choice of food for about 12 USD (We got tea, fries and a spaghetti bolognese) and the seats are like business class; they recline to about 70 degrees!!!! Madd comfortable!

I enjoyed the movie; full of action, pretty good story; I just watch movies for the fun anyway; if they elicit emotion I enjoy it.

TB continued (I'm feeling dizzy looking at a computer screen)

That's so novice, I'm so polished, I got a little right to be snobbish

So young Tsuizzie karaoke'd "Can You Feel the Love Tonight" and received applause; believe it!!!! I was told my deep voice would sound real nice for chinese songs and that I look like some asian singer? Who knows. I'll let you know which one when I find out the name and google.

Today I felt real dizzy due to lack of sleep and my stomachache from yesterday. I had a bought with KFC and lost (too much oil). I woke up today at 4AM w/stomach pains. During the day I really just couldn't focus and had to call it a day at 3. Went home and slept for 3 hr.

At around 7 Ruru picked me up to go eat at her bro's restaurant. It was a buffet of sorts. I got some mongolian cooked beef, fried noodles, an apple hand roll, salmon sashimi (a must) and some pastry w/frosting. It was all pretty good, but I ended up getting too much food and not finishing a lot due to my stomach. In asia, the people get pissed at you if you buy their food and waste it; the busgirl gave us a nasty face when we said we were done. Her bro even told me 3 times not to waste food although he knew my stomach was all jacked up. Oh well.

Afterwards she drove us to a cliffside where we enjoyed milktea and coffee while relaxing with a mystical view of the lights of a city (not sure which) below us. We basically pulled up to a cart on the side of the road; it has its own dirt parking lot w/plastic lawn chairs facing the city below. Really beautiful and soothing to relax after a long week of work with someone you enjoy spending time with. It really was just what the doctor ordered.

We spent maybe 2 hours there and eventually she brought me home. I think we're gonna go see a movie tomorrow at this theater where I believe the seats recline 100% flat like first class. I'll let you know how that goes...

It's the Abominable Ho Man

"747 410's, my cell phone just overloads"

So the last couple days have been very nice to me numbers wise. After the night market on Monday night. Aside from the the standard 1 day wait to contact, that morning I went down as usual to breakfast. There are 3 cute girls at the breakfast buffet working; 1 was there the first day as the hostess who is a little more curvy and uses her 9 rated smile alot. There is also a girl in white who usually cleans up after tables who looks really mysterious as her hair falls over her face over one eye. I think it really helps her attractiveness level; the closer she got, the worse it got (but she still is a 6 when all is said and done). The last one died her hair a bit reddish/copper color which works very well for her. I really like the tuxedo she rocks; really makes her seem extremely sexy and takes attention of her body which is really just not there.

I'd say that's a wonderful lineup to work with every morning. I noticed her eye contact with me lasted longer than the usual Hi, it's nice to see you; why are you looking at me so long, F you, look. This was more of a, I'm interested a bit in you because you're so tall, have such a sexy voice, look like a baller and most of all are so so pretty, but maybe that's just me. I was able to chat a bit with her, and used the opportunity to point out that I had not seen her the past couple days. She noted it was because she took vacation (looked happy I noticed) and said she attended a friend's wedding. She followed with, "It kind of sucks because I don't want to get married so sometimes I don't like weddings because my family members and friends start asking me." I recognized this from somewhere (hint hint: my ex-gf). This is a great comment to hear from a lady. I cut off the convo and went to work.

Wednesday was judgement day. I strutted into the breakfast area to find Ruru there smiling as usual. I really got talked into Ruru; I feel in life, sometimes when there is census telling you to go another way, I Follow the census; this happens w/music sometimes and w/chicks. I did notice the other two at first, but really got a lot of vibe from Ruru. When I left, I made good eye contact w/her and she actually talked to me to the point where I had to stop and stay behind. We discussed a bit about the fact that I'm not really great at Chinese. SHe then had to take a customer to a seat, and I walked off (the best thing to do is to NOT wait around for a lady.) I saw her go back to the hostess desk and waited a minute to walk back confidently, "Would you lke to hang out sometime?" "Yes" "Well can you write your # down? What's your name?" "Ruru, here it is."

We discussed that Friday would probably work; I left it at that. That afternoon I texted my girl Tutu and eventually got on the phone w/the youngster. I told her in the evening around 7 that I was indeed off from work and for her to call me after work (possibly 1230) if she wasn't tired, and if I wasn't asleep, I would go out w/her. She aked me several times if I was sure (as it is textbook for girls to attempt to talk a guy out of doing something w/them) and I emphatically answered, "Yes."

I fell asleep around 930 and woke to ringing at ~12:45. The date was set; she would scooter to my hotel and we'd cab it over to a bar w/live music. The musician/band was extremely entertaining. The lead guy was really funny and would (for example) bow after the female sung a solo. The female asked, "Is your back ok?" "Yeah it's fine, I'm bowing because people are clapping for me." "Nah, they clappin for me homie." HUUUUUUH!!!!!!!

I enjoyed a Kahlua while she enjoyed some sort of fruity cocktail. We munched on fries and chatted during/between and through sets they played. It was extremely enjoyable. At one point a dark black dude walked through the club that I could swear was my coworker, but it ended up actually just looking like an exact replica of him 10 yr older. He looked like the dude from "Get Rich or Die Tryin'" who is the leader of the black gangsters and doesn't really speak much; he just wears that big black hat.

We eventually left around 3:45 when it was about to close; Tutu nicely told me that instead of cabbing back to the hotel to scoot home, we'd get a cab, take her home, then I'd go home from her place (I preferred her coming to my hotel). I agreed but still offered (and was rejected) my bedroom to her as it WAS getting a bit late. She told me she'd call a cab instead of use a st. cab because the phone cabs are safer and won't steal your money (as in they won't drive around aimlessly and collect more fare than what should be collected). I thought this was very admirable and kind of her. I dropped her off and said, "Hug?" She politely and awkwardly looked and said, "Uhhh, bye bye." Rejected again.

The night still was a success. Now I lay in my hotel bed, ready for a nap before a big date w/Ruru. I am starting to really like it here.

11th day of Taiwan statistics:

# total: 4

Contact made: 4

Dates: 1

Night markets snap Tsuizzie's weekend slump!

If there is one thing to remember about Taiwan, it is the night markets. There are a few night markets per big city (well I only consider Taipei and Taichung big cities since those are the only 2 I really have been to). They are open until midnight on weekdays and 2AM on weekends. You can buy almost anything you want here; there are dozens of restaurants, the streets are littered with stands selling jewelry, food, clothing and the sidewalks are lined with games, arcades and other shops.

Before we begin, I attempted to call Alice and was unsuccessful; for some reason texts would not send, and phone calls would not go through. This was the same girl I asked to call China, so I went downstairs determined to have her help me again; this time w/her own number. "I need help again, this time with a Taiwan number." "Excuse me? What was your question?" (I think she must be hard of hearing or something because I've had this problem more than once with her; I'll skip these hard of hearing responses in future convo details) "I need your help dialing a Taiwan number; it hasn't been working." "Sure, let me see what I can do. Well, it looks like this isn't a complete number, you need a 6th digit at the end." (mind you she's looking at her own phone number) "Oh really? That's odd, that's why it hasn't been working. Does the number look familiar?" "Huh? Ummm.... Oh... that's my number... hahaha"

We all laughed it out and I told her I'd tried to call her over the weekend. I asked if tonight after work was a good time and she said that tomorrow may work better, though she had to get her computer fixed after work ended at 8. I said I'll call you and set it all up. Hopefully it works out.

Back to the night market. I managed to purchase an interesting V neck buttoned shirt; it looks decent over a button down and am not sure what else. The main objective was to hit on chicks; boy is this the place to go for that. There are probably 100s of chicks walking around at all times; the university is literally a block away. My first approach was a good one; I stepped up to a cute little girl with long long hair and auburn color dangling from the ends. She helped me look at a couple business card holders and eventually I bought one for 5 USD (I saw similar ones online for 30). My coworker usually says she's my older sister and is helping translate chinese for me as I'm from America and my language skills are weak. She followed suit today and we made a decent team. I eventually commented that I liked the youngster's hair and she really was pleased w/the comment. Her coworker flashed from behind a door in a weak attempt to cockblock, but i immediately engaged her in convo and frightened her away. I then stepped back up (took a bit too long) and asked if we could be friends after wondering aloud what she did on weekends (doesn't like dancing because the music is too loud, but loves to drink and relax). I told her this was perfect because my hotel has a really lax bar we could chill at. She said ok, and I got her #. She called her phone from my number and typed in my chinese name.

Eventually I took a little bit long to leave, but got out unscathed. I'll probably call her on Wednesday to set something up for either that day or Thursday night. It'll be tough since I'll have a lot of work this week; hopefully i can get everything done and get little big Ken some action as well.

Over the next 1.5 hr, I kept swinging and missing at an assortment of offspeed and high fastballs. Really just got torn up, although I really did make a good effort, engaging many different females of all different heights, weights and tones. I learned a valuable lesson during one exchange where I asked what the girl did during weekends and she told me she played mah jong. Instead of saying, "Wow, I play, can I play with you and your friends?" I should've said, "Wow, I play... if you have enough money, I might let you get in on our games." In retrospect, both sound terrible... I'll keep thinking.

We ended the night by spending 100's (each 100 = about 3 USD) on an archery, gun and baseball stand. Man, who knew paying 3 dollars for 15 balls would be so much fun. We threw them at these strikezones made of 9 boxes, 3 across and 3 down. The most I knocked over was 5 with about 20 balls. It is really tough!!!! Shout out to Chien Ming Wang, the Taiwanese sensation who probably couldn't even hit 5 right now.

I've run out of gas; on the 8th day of Taiwan I'm now:

# total: 3
Contact made: 2
Dates: 0

Unlikely pen pal

The last day of my Hong Kong weekend started with a bang. I woke up to what I thought was my 10AM wake up call, but instead was Lynette telling me Stanley St. was 30 min away via taxi, so we'd have to leave earlier than 10:45AM. I quickly showered, and called them to see if they'd be ready. THey said 5 min, so I decided to go downstairs and check out while they gathered their belongings. After about 15 min it was about 10:45 and we were ready to leave; luckily I had found out from the front desk attendant that Stanley St. Luk Yu Teahouse was actually only 10 min away via cab.

WHen the cab driver dropped us off we tried to walk in the front door only to be turned away and told to go upstairs. I didn't see my Aunt anywhere, so I went back down to look for her. She arrived and told us to go downstairs instead. I was confused. After I gathered everyone we went down and that was when I realized Auntie Ling Ling has juice at this place. Basically only ballers or VIPs can sit downstairs and she was ordering around waitors like she owned the place. She explained she had been tipping them 40-50% of the bill for the last 27 years (before I was born) every single morning for tea and breakfast.

Auntie Ling Ling is a riot. She talked up a storm and correctly guessed Lynette is Singaporean (impressive) and that Eric was from the US (not difficult). I then told her about my lady soaking ways and instantly she began going through her mental roladex of Mandarin students (she is a mandarin teacher in Hong Kong). She began listing all the pretty ladies she teaches who are all lawyers, accountants, etc... all having no time to find men, all working late into the night every day of the week. She actually got one of them to come out to meet us later for some afternoon tea which was nice of her.

We then walked around a large shopping district with lots of little stands. I managed to purchase a t-shirt for my sister for 59 HKD, 2 bracelets and 2 necklaces for 250 HKD (a set of which was mine), a belt for 40 HKD and finally a monkey T shirt for 40 HKD. All in all that is 390 HKD for a grand total of? 53 dollars (pretty nasty!!!).

Later we met up with Auntie Ling Ling and her student (who was not as impressive as she made seem) and were faced with a monstrous chocolate buffet (delicious, but too much chocolate). We then returned to the hotel, picked up our things and headed to the airport. The flight home was a tiring one. There was one 6.5, and two 6's (flight attendants), none of whose numbers I accumulated which left me with a grand total of 0 through my weekend of HK. I really struck out big time on Saturday amassing a golden sombrero (0/4 4 stikeouts).

I really enjoyed HK though I must say I believe I like China a little better? Maybe it's because I had more people taking me around China and it's so much less expensive. I tried calling Alice, but for some reason my phone would not call/text her number. We finally realized her phone must've been off, or there was just something wrong w/my phone. Really annoying. If there's one thing to take away from my blog, it's that phones in Asia SUCK!!!! No voicemail really just kills me (maybe it's just taht I can't read chinese so I feel really lost when faced with a phone).

Anyway, the last thing I'll offer is this. I really miss my friends. Can you please include me in some freaking emails?!?!?!?!?! Would it really kill you?

I forgot to mention that my cleanup hitter emailed me again. She mentioned she quit and I told her hopefully it wasn't cuz of me and my coworker (we are auditors) that she quit and also mentioned though that we didn't really talk to her, so it coudlnt' have been. For some reason she responded and said yeah, she quit for personal reasons, but asked if we could still be friends... really not sure what's going on with that.

My results so far after day 7 of Taiwan (including HK):

# total: 2
Contact attempt/made: 1/1
Dates: 0

Horrible.